about erin

the sway is a passion project that has been swirling in the back of my brain since my first pregnancy and pp. I was pretty blown away about my lack of understanding when it comes to mumming and that is coming from someone who works in mental health!

I’m a turned 40 in 2024 millennial

I’m a gerimama of two (aka I had two “geriatric pregnancies” with one bub at 36 and my latest little one at 41 - the medical worlds term def not mine)

I’ve been working as a psychologist in the private practice space for over 7 years

Our first bub was “unplanned” but very very wanted and our second bub was planned but took us about 3 years and a little bit of IVF magic to conceive

At first I was reluctant to have another bub due to the impact on my career and finances and I’m often resentful of how having children impacts women

I’ve been humbled by motherhood in more ways than I can count

I met the husband at age 35 and we got married in 2024

I looove my job and working with women

In another life I studied professional writing but have never professionally written after pivoting to study psychology at 27 years

I’ve just realised I was a “mature age” at uni, met my husband later in life and am now a “mature aged” mama. hmmmm so much to unpack!

Our first pregnancy hit a little different as our bub had a large VSD (hole in her heart). this meant making some big decisions during our pregnancy and our little one going through heart surgery at 4 weeks.

I’ve experienced pregnancies and births in the public and private system in Melbourne, Australia

I would describe my current post partum style as Adam Sandler esq but luckily oversize is in

I am a need some alone time to recharge type of person. I’ve found this difficult to manage being in a relationship and mumming

We are very lucky and have 4 more embryos on ice however given my age there are some complex feelings swirling in the background about what to do with them

I was shocked by the level of criticism and judgment in mumming when first entering this space

We made the move down the peninsula from Melbourne just over a year ago

I went from a hustle and grind mindset to an embrace the slow era - moving down the beach has helped a lot with this

I struggled for a very long time with my relationship to my body but as I get older and through having my babies this seems to be easing

While mumming I’ve experienced intrusive thinking, loss of identity, overstimulation, intense irritability, mum rage, and existential anxiety about my kids futures

I have experienced grief about not being where I thought I would be at different stages of my life

I’ve had two c-sections, one after a failed induction (with a side of retained placenta) and the other a healing, calm and beautiful maternally assisted caesar

My hobbies include drinking coffee, avid pinteresting, getting hyperfocused on things like finding the perfect white tee or coffee table book or hair colour or rearranging my wardrobe

I swear. Often. A fact now called out to me by my 4 year old multiple times a day

I tangent. A lot.

I’m going to say it. I highly disliked breastfeeding and didn’t love pregnancy

I’m a little concerned given my post partum experiences how my upcoming perimenopause and menopause will affect my mumming and relationship

In this mumming stage I miss my friends. I miss my autonomy. I miss my time. I miss my relationship. I miss my aesthetically pleasing environment. I miss parts of myself. But I miss it all knowing this is temporary, and will all come back to me

I love stories, I think they are incredibly powerful at creating connection and understanding and can’t wait to hear yours

with love

ERIN